So I've been trying to be helpful about the house and garden, I really have. Although to date my human has failed to recognise this. She has even been calling me (and this is one of the politer names) 'Nuisance Nobby'.
But it's appropriate to taste the water in the bucket, to check suitability for use in washing the floor, is it not?
Likewise, one has to carefully, and repeatedly, examine for texture and chewability the bristles on each of the brooms Gail uses. Everyone knows how inefficient it is to sweep a surface with the wrong sort of brush.
In the garden, I look for other opportunities to be of use, assisting with the digging up of weeds and of course ensuring the trowel is moved to where Gail can find it (or not).
The grip of the handles on a pair of old secateurs can be greatly improved with the addition of special puppy teeth marks*. Gail will appreciate this when I no longer have my 'land shark' dentition...
I even tried to assist Gail in cleaning her bicycle with an oily rag I found just lying around, but no, you've guessed it, once more not appreciated.
It seems the only thing I can do right in Gail's eyes at the moment is to sit quietly on the arm of the old sofa and adopt my 'adorable watch dog' pose...
*Gail says: The whole truth here is that Nobby merely improved on some earlier work on the secateurs (originally executed by his much missed predecessor Bouncing Bertie).