IF (THE NOBBY VERSION)
If I were a frog,
And not a soggy dog,
I wouldn't mind the rain.
If I were a lobster
And not Sir Nobby Nobster
I'd really not complain.
If I were a walrus
And not remotely porous,
I'd frolic in the ocean.
And if I were a sealion
And not a whip-smart canine
I'd always choose a soaking.
If I were a puffin,
For whom a flood means nothin',
I'd not be agitated
But I am a fox terrier,
And frankly I am merrier,
When my land's not inundated.
