Wednesday 18 September 2024

Kidnap risk?

Gosh there are already so many matters to worry about in today's world. I really didn't need another thing to add the list. 

On Monday morning, on the way back from our weekend in Ayr, Gail and I stopped for a leg stretch in the small town of Auchterarder, and I was most concerned to see this warning sign on the main street.

Yes you read it right: "Skinny People Are Easy To Kidnap. Stay Safe. Eat Cake."

Well, my owner Gail is not exactly skinny, but she is relatively thin and now I'm all anxious that she might fall into the 'kidnap-vulnerable' category. 

Who would feed me and take me for walks and give me morning cuddles if she were to be taken hostage? 

How ever would I raise the ransom?

Oh dear. It seems the only way I can mitigate the risk is by encouraging her to up her cake consumption. 

More pies apparently might also do the trick...

So that's Gail's winter diet sorted!

13 comments:

  1. Hari OM
    Well, Nobby, I think you may have fallen prey to some variation on fake news/conspiracy theory designed to extract more money from gullible (albeit hungry) passers by! Worry not your handsome head - seek crumbs from the pies and cakes instead! Hugs and wags YAM-aunty xxx

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  2. that is a super advice... we will protect us now with making a super big cake...

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  3. Don't worry, Nobby. No-one will kidnap Gail while you are in attendance.

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  4. That sounds like yummy advice to me, Nobby, but I'm not sure that Gail will go for it.

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  5. Beau says this is good news for both of us, neither of us in in the Kidnappable Zone of weight. we are safe, and we don't even eat pies. ha ha

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  6. We think this is a great idea Nobby....as long as she shares with you!
    xoxo,
    Rosy & Sunny

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  7. Nobby that is for sure a worry....I too would like to encourage Gail to eat more cake. However, no worries I'll gladly start set up a go fund me page to help with her ransom.
    Hugs Cecilia who will never have to worry about being kidnapped
    I'd talk so much the 'nappers would kick me to the curb in 87 nano seconds

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  8. We think as long as you stay attached to Gail by your walking string nobody would dare kidnap her, Nobby. Around here it would be our dad we'd have to worry about being kidnapped, but we would still have our mom to take care of us.

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  9. If kidnapping is a particular concern in Aberdeen, you and Gail would probably be relatively safe simply because you both move faster than most people (and many dogs). F would gladly contribute to Celia's go fund me page if ransom did become an issue but take advice from the shipping industry - never let anyone know if you have kidnap insurance (it's a term of the insurance cover).

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  10. PS - it's really really really hot here in Scotland. I'm starting to think the rumour about cold and wet is just to keep softy tourists away.

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  11. We both vote for more cake and more pies, and be sure she doesn't get any with chocolate or raisins so you can to partake too. We don't need either of you being subject to kid-or pup- nappingL:)

    Woos - Misty and Timber

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  12. Goodness Nobby, what a terrible thing to happen to thin people! We'd all better start eating more cake and pies.
    Love,
    Paca xx

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